Monday, April 30, 2012

Day 30: A New Way of Thinking

This is the last day of blogging every day in April for the Cushing's Awareness Challenge.

For many months and like many Cushies, I have been feeling so STUCK and HOPELESS.  I felt like nothing I do seems to matter until I can get Cushing's off my back. There is just no need to keep rehashing what I already know: I am sick and uncured.  I KNOW!  Why must I remind myself of it every few minutes of every day?!

Someone recently reminded me that signs are all around us. Our minds must be open to see it, and our hearts must be open to take it in.  During this challenge, I have had many signs signaling to me what I need to do to move forward in my life.

I realize now that I have the world ahead of me, and it is my duty to pump as much life back into my daily living as I possibly can.

Time to learn to live with it because it is part of my life, at least for now.

From now on, I will work to think about myself in a much more positive light.

I will forgive myself more, and I will give myself a break.

I am doing the absolute best that I can each and every day. Some days I can do some things, and on the other days, I will rest and try again another day.

I must be more loving to myself.  I must drop all the guilt I feel about not being the kind of person/ friend/ mother/ wife I want to be, the kind of person that I used to be, not like this person I just met who is fabulous, or anything I wish I could do but can't quite do it now.

That is such a waste of effort!  I tires me, and I am already so exhausted. There is no reason to pile it on more.

I will make more effort to celebrate my caring spirit as I continue to help those around me who learn to live with Cushing's.

I don't do it enough, but I, too, must learn to deal with Cushing's with Moxie... every hour and every day it is with me.  It is the only way I know to continue moving forward and surviving this journey.


P. S. Just to compare, you can see day one's post for my Old way of thinking.  As for me, I'm not looking back.