Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Cushing's Awareness Day 2: Depression Cloud Follows Cushies

Cushing's patients face mental as well as physical changes from excess cortisol and pituitary/ adrenal tumors, making it excruciatingly more difficult to cope.

I logged onto my online Cushing's group tonight. 
Within minutes, I see this poem from Theresa in California.  

Without hesitation, I wrote to her:

This saddens me so much, Theresa. Yet, I related to all the words.  I even felt the same way you expressed in the last line.  I ask you, Please hang on.  It is a dark road, but you can make it. You can survive. Hang on to us here. Together, we will stand strong.
I then asked Theresa if I could share this here.  She was thankful for the support and granted my request.

For Theresa, myself, and all the other Cushies out there who struggle to understand this new world into which we have been completed submerged, I share this poem with you.

Once again I've opened my eyes
to another day of sickening thoughts and silent criesMy mind awakes once more to realizeI must face yet another day of struggling to surviveThe pain sets in and the unrealistic, realistic thoughts pour inI cannot concentrate, focus, just sit and wonder how to beginTo get back the life I once had, so normal and trueLoving family surrounding, yet none with a clueFilled with disease my body began to failTo disintegrate, fall apart and become frailAway from reality, family and friendsIts taken me to hell without any endI've lost my life, my friends are fewFamily doesn't understand, as white trash I am viewedI don't want to go on, each night I lay my headI pray I'll just sink into the ground because I feel I am already dead.